3/2/2015

 

Today is my 49^th birthday.  It’s hard to believe, really.  I don’t FEEL 49.  Well, okay, maybe in body…but definitely not in mind or spirit.  I still feel like a young person – maybe mid 20’s?  I like to think of myself as young at heart, with a reasonably sharp mind, and youthful spirit.  Heck, I like to THINK of myself as a size 8, with sharp eyesight, smooth skin, and muscle tone.  I reckon it’s my thinking and I can do it any way I want, right? 

 

Yep. I’m getting older.  Hopefully wiser is going along with that at a comfortable pace.  I’m not yet to the “repeating stories” age.  I’m thankful for that.  Plus, I’m not yet to the “repeating stories” age…so clearly I’m not old.  There’s a difference between being old and just getting older.  Let me give you some examples:  My dad is at the “repeating stories” age.  My mom is at the “can’t remember if I told you this story” age.  My husband is at the “you did NOT tell me that” age.  Me – I’m just at the “I was going to tell you something, but forgot what it was” age.  My oldest son is at the “you can’t tell me anything” age, and my youngest is at the “yeah, yeah, I know. You already told me that; I get it!” age.

I’ll tell you another age that I’ve reached…the age where I wonder what my legacy will be.  As a mother, I know that part of my legacy will be in my children, and in their children and so forth.  My Davey is well on his way to living out the dreams he has always had of being a singer/songwriter/musician/worship leader.  I remember walking into the living room one day when he was about 4 years old.  There was a video playing of an old contemporary Christian group, 4-Him, singing a song called “A Man You Would Write About”, and there was my Davey, standing in front of the TV, both hands in the air singing the lyrics to this song at the top of his lungs.  “I wanna be a man that You would write about. Oh, a thousand years from now that they could read about – The servant of choice in whom You found favor – a man who heard Your Voice.”  Oh, his journey here to this place of purpose hasn’t been easy or smooth.  The boy built his testimony; I’ll give him that.  Let me break down the word for you – Test, I moany (or money!).  But he has come out on the other side with an understanding of Grace, Mercy, and the unmerited Favor & Love of God that I truly believe he will carry the rest of his days – and share with others through his passion for music that glorifies God.  I’m proud to have him as part of my legacy. 

My Daniel, also, is a huge part of my legacy.  Because he’s still in high school, we don’t yet know what path he will choose for his life, but we can look back and see that his life has been a testimony to perseverance, patience, and love.  From a very young child with few words, and a host of the idiosyncrasies that accompany autism, to a young man who consistently tests at the top of his class in all things language oriented, has friends, an amazing talent at drawing, singing, and songwriting (which he is often too shy to share – but trust me – he’s every bit as talented musically as his brother!), who hopes someday to be a computer animator, creating his own characters & story lines…Daniel’s life is a testament to the power of prayer and sheer determination.  (Hey, Pixar! In a few years, have I got a guy for you!!)

So, indeed – my children are truly a part of my legacy.  They’re also my current retirement plan, but that’s a different blahg all together!

There’s nothing like a birthday to fire up the old introspective mood, is there?  “Dude, I’m 49 years old, and what do I have to show for it?”  It’s easy to look outward – at your children – and see that you weren’t a perfect parent, but you were okay and they’re okay and it’s all gonna be okay. Someone – couldn’t tell ya who – said, “There are only two lasting bequests we can give our children. One is roots.  The other is wings.”  I think, hope, PRAY – I’ve done that…. But it’s the looking inward – realllllly looking inward – that gets scary.  Man, I don’t want to leave the earth and stand before God with nothing to show Him for the time that He has given me here. Erma Bombeck once said, “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything You gave me’.” There’s my heart, right there. 

 

It can be concerning, this introspection.  It doesn’t have to be.  What does God ask of me?  Micah 6:8 spells it out, “O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what He requires of you:  to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” Oh, those are not the ONLY things He asks of us – but I think all the specifics stem from these generalities.  Bear each other’s burdens, take up my cross & follow Him, love as He did, be His Hands & Feet, give, grow, seek His Face, worship Him alone, be courageous, defend the weak, be kind, don’t worry, be faithful, stand firm trusting Him, preach the Word, avoid evil, embrace righteousness, be honest, know Him.  The list goes on and on…it looks pretty intimidating, huh?  Really – really – it’s just about Love.  Loving like Jesus did.  Loving Him, loving others, and seeing ourselves through His Eyes enough to know who we are in Him so that we can love Him, love others, and see ourselves through His Eyes….you get the picture? 

I think, perhaps, Legacy is not so much about having the world remember US when we’re gone, but more about how the world views Him because our lives were lived in a way that pointed to Him.  Charles Spurgeon once said, “A good character is the best tombstone. Those who love you, and were helped by you, will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered.  Carve your name on hearts, not on marble.” And I think that’s really the crux of this thing Legacy.  In the grand scheme of things, it’s not about how we are remembered.  It’s about how HE is remembered because we lived.  My life – your life – is about how we walk with God.  My Legacy – your Legacy – is about who we touched for God.  One life touched with the Love of God by a Lover of God will echo not only throughout the history of earth, but throughout eternity as well.  They become our Legacy – a hundred years from now, our names may not be heard in the halls of memory, except perhaps in Family Tree listings…but a hundred years from now, there will be someone alive who is a Lover of God simply because someone you once touched, touched someone else..and so forth and so on – until time passes away and we stand before God all joined together, dots all connected, lines all drawn – and we see clearly our Legacy and know that it always was and always will be about Him.